Deception Online and in Dating

Deception on the Internet, to me, seems to be a concern that is fading away. Growing up alongside the Internet, I've seen it change from a place where parents would warn of all the fraud that was sure to be be found, to a place where many serious relationships have not only formed but thrived. As we discussed in class, it is difficult to lie online because much of your online life is rooted in your offline life. 

So, what kind of threat is online deception? A bill has recently been introduced to the state senate in Washington that would make it easier for someone to sue another for impersonating them online. If someone creates a false Facebook account in your name, and that account causes you physical or financial injury, or injury to your reputation, you would be well within your rights to sue them. This bill was introduced after a fake ad was put up on Craigslist and a Tacoma woman's home was ransacked because the ad welcomed anyone to come and take the things in her home for free. 

There is definitely a case to be made for deception in Internet dating. It is easy to make up a fake account and pretend to be someone else, even to completely swap genders. Dr. Jeffery Hancock said that lying happens more often than we think, but its not about how big the lies are but how many. About 8 out of 10 people lie on online dating sites, for example when asked about their height it is common to post 5'11'' instead of 5'10''. But even in the real world we use these "white lie deceptions". Women wear high heels and makeup, men wear shoulder pads under their coat jackets; isn't dressing taller than you are the same as saying it? However, online users are careful to make their lies small so if they ever do meet offline, it won't be noticeable enough on the first date to ruin their chances of a second. 

Dr. Hancock touches on "evolutionary psychology" (how each gender behaves in ways consistent with evolution) where men and women lie about different things. In a study he found that men tend to make their lies more about themselves, for example, how much money they make, and their height.  Where women tend to lie about their body weight and lying to make other people feel better about themselves. Dr. Hancock speaks about some women lying about their weight online but thinking of it more as a promise or a goal. So when they say they weigh less than they do, they will have a promise to keep and be that weight by the time they first meet face to face.

Although we spoke about many of the social norms in class that prevent us from completely making up an identity it seems smaller lies are much more prevalent than we think. Although the lies may not be big deal breakers, they could start a relationship on the unsteady foundation of a deception. 

(I would encourage you to watch the video hyperlinked to Dr. Hancock's name, its very interesting!)

Save us from ourselves - Teen texting

I'll be the first person to admit I'm easily..... sorry, distracted. Put me behind the wheel of a car and you better have all your business in order because its always a thrill to see if we make it from point A to point B; add a cell phone to this already potent mix, and boy do we have a path straight to disaster. 

According to a report by Amanda Lenhart, texting by adults has increased from 65% receiving texts in September 2009 to 72% in May 2010. But adults are still dwarfed by 12 - 17 year olds who send five times more text messages than adults. Adults receive about 10 text messages per day where as teens receive about 50. There are only so many hours in a day so this leads me to wonder, how many of those 50 text messages come while those old enough to operate a vehicle are driving? 

Many teens think texting and driving is OK because nothing really bad has ever happened to them, so they crossed the middle line (it was only a little) or ran up on a curb (there was no one there anyway). But just like gambling, your luck will surely run out. At some point it is going to happen and close calls are going to turn into calls to an insurance agency. Teens have a feeling of invincibility and I'll admit I sometimes think that way too. Bad things happen to other people because they aren't careful like I am, right? For your viewing pleasure I have found a little snippet that makes ideas like the one I just presented seem sheepish.

But there are people trying to find ways to discourage texting while driving and other distracted driving habits. There is an app that disables your cell phone when you drive so it can only take voice commands, gadgets that can detect when your car is straying from the lane markers and good old-fashioned laws. In fact, a bill just passed in the North Dakota House of Representatives on Tuesday banning texting and driving and handing out a $100 fine and a 2-point penalty on their license for anyone caught. A news station in Vermont followed up it's states ban on using electronic devices while driving by interviewing students at a local high school and the students felt that the law went a little too far. 

"I wouldn't be a fan of that because I know I use, well, I try not to text and drive but I have my iPod on." said senior Jessica Cota. "I don't know if that would work for me. No one will obey it. It's not going to happen, just like no cell phones in school, that didn't happen either."

Teen sentiments on texting bans are strong but I think it is because technology, such as cell phones, have become so engrained in their lives that when lawmakers take something as constant and something as attached as a cell phone away from them, its like cutting of an arm. But other states, as well as many other countries have rules in place that keep their constituents from even holding a cell phone while driving and they have managed. I think we need to set some ground rules for cell phone use and although it may be hated in the beginning I believe teens will eventually come to accept it. But it is obvious that because cells phones are starting to become so inseparable from our lives it is clear we need to find another way to keep us from hurting ourselves.